The Weigh in 90

This week in my world:

With 300, the first BIG geek movie coming out this Friday, it only makes sense that this week we sit back and take a look at the films you should all be looking forward to this Spring. Plus.. well.. it is springtime. At least down here Dallas way. This week is The Weigh In’s annual:

Spring Dork Movies you should all see (ok so next year I’ll come up with a better name, promise).

(3/9/2007) 300: The film based on the Frank Miller graphic novel tells the story of the battle of Thermopylae. The film uses the same technique as Miller’s last film Sin City. Fans are expecting a film stuffed with violence and a visual experience that brings the graphic novel to life.

(3/23/2007) The Hills Have Eyes 2: Although I am not the biggest fan of remakes and sequels of remakes just make my skin crawl, the original was a blast of gore and violence. Add the military on a bloody rampage and I think you might have a pretty fun movie.

(3/23/2007) TMNT: Michaelangelo, Leonardo, Rafael, and Donatello are back and this time rather than having guys in rubbersuits, this film is a completely computer generated film made to look almost live action. The film picks up after the 2nd live action film and is meant to revitalize the franchise. The filmmakers are going for a darker more adult approach to the Turtles. While I am no longer a fan of the Ninja Turtles, as a movie fan I am interested to see what they are able to do with the technology.

(3/30/2007) Meet the Robinsons: The last in-house Disney computer animated film before making nice with Pixar looks pretty funny and a pretty film to boot. This could be the first computer animated family film in a long time that isn’t complete crap.

(4/6/2007) Grindhouse: Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino have combined their skills to recreate the horror/superaction/drive in experience known as the Grindhouse. Each director is doing one short film effectively creating a double feature. Mix sexploitation and violence with a distinctively grainy seventies feel and a list of directors to make a movie fan drool helping out with faux commercials and you have a full house of movie buffs and what could be a great film.. er set of films.

(4/13/2007) Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters: A marketing gimmick originally mistaken as a terrorist threat and a hit on Adult Swim, this movie is either going to be totally cool, or a complete mess. Either way, it sounds like something I want to see.

(4/20/2007) Hot Fuzz: All I should really have to say is “from the creators of Shaun of the Dead”. Instead, I’ll say that this film is a parody of action films starring a hot shot cop who is relocated to a small provincial English town where he notices a strange slew of accidental deaths. Plenty of violence and dark comedy ensues. Looks friggin hilarious and would take a team of wild horses to keep me away.

(4/27/2007) The Condemned: I am about to recommend a WWE films vehicle starring alum Stone Cold Steve Austin. But hold on, listen to the premise. A prisoner in a South American prison is purchased by a movie producer to participate in a reality television show of sorts; A battle royale against other bad asses (Vinnie Jones anyone??). Forget the complete ripoff of Battle Royale and The Running Man, it is a flick about guys killing each other for tv ratings. I’d pay to see that. Hell, I’d watch Fox if they announced it as their next big reality show.

All the news that’s fit to forget (real news, not so real commentary):

Paramount is creating a direct to DVD division and one of the most notable ideas involves bringing the Zuckers and Leslie Nielsen back together for a series of Airplane and Police Squad sequels. O.J. Simpson was signed on to pick up where his original character left off on Police Squad, but backed out after the writers kept having Frank Drebbin refer to him as that killer football player and the director refused to let him use the knives at the craft services table.

According to www.moviehole.net, a group of wunderkind that are in control of what you will see and hear at your local multiplex are currently working on a reworking of the 80’s classic Weekend At Bernie’s. Take a sec and read that again. Weekend at Bernie’s. Rumor has it that the re imagining will involve a group of wunderkind executives spending the weekend in a local theater trying to convince the rest of the world that the film audience isn’t completely brain dead.

The film Mummy 3 is set to begin filming without any of the original cast or director. Jet Li is set to star and the film is said to be set in China. Critics believe the film will not do well in China, not because of the gross inaccuracies about their culture, but the translated title: Dead Toilet Paper Ninja Man isn’t testing well.

This weekend at your local multiplex (3/9/2007):

300: Action/Fantasy
Gerard Butler, Leana Headey, David Wenham, Vincent Regan, Rodrigo Santoro, Dominic West
Plot: Based on Frank Miller’s graphic novel, which is in turn based on the Spartan battle of Thermopylae. 300 Spartan soldiers fight off a Persian invasion force. The battle inspires and unites the Greek cities to save their country.
Buzz: The first big geek film of 2007. Not only is it directed by Zack Snyder of Dawn of the Dead fame but the entire film is filmed in green screen ala Sin City and looks like a shot of testosterone to your junk. This film looks completely insane and is an absolute must see on the big screen for comic book and movie fans.

This week on DVD (3/6/2007):

Borat
Fast Food Nation
Let’s Go To Prison
Revenge of the Nerds (se)
Peter Pan (se)
South Park (season 9)
The Full Monty: Fully Exposed Edition
Moonlighting (season 5)
Sabrina: The Teenage Witch (season 1)
Beverly Hills Cops: Box Set
Hawaii Five-O (season 1)
Literary Classics Collection
Northern Exposure (season 6)
Stargate Atlantis (season 2)
Decoys 2: The Second Seduction
Hemingway Classics Collection
Confetti
Private School

 

As always, you can send me your loving adoration and hate mail to DPlace76@yahoo.com. You can read about my random musings at http://bigdpimpin.livejournal.com/ and you can read about all of the comings and goings of the Stumblebum crew at www.myspace.com/stumblebumstudios.